| DREAMS...
What do they mean? Sometimes I really ponder all day wondering what my dreams are telling me. Especially the scary ones where something bad happens to me. I wake up this morning feeling a bit uneasy. I had a bad dream. One I have not had for awhile.
CAR CRASH! That's basically what happened in my dream.. It felt so very real. I'm driving to the city and I'm on the freeway. Apparently I'm on my blackberry and texting. It's raining mad outside and getting dark but it's not really dark yet. It's only 3 or 4 in the afternoon and I'm supposed to meet my family for dinner in the city. So I'm on t he freeway and the road splits into two. I was way too early for dinner obviously and my choice was to either wait at the restaurant until dinner started or go shopping. That's when it all happened...
I CRASH! The road is slippery and cars are hitting me this way and that. I tumble over and over and cars are still hitting me. I'm in the car and thankful i had my seat belt secured and prayed I wasn't going to die right then and there. Deep down I had a feeling I was going to die just yet. The car finally stops and lands upside down on a side of a hill. That's when I wake up from the crash and now in the hospital. I assume I'm all scratched up and in bandages. My family is there but there is no pity that I'm in this condition. There are more friends and family that show up and visit. I believe...deep down there was only one person I wanted to visit me. If they were worried about me when they found out about my crash. Of course they didn't show up, silly me. Why would they when they've already disappointed me more than once. Silly of me to even think that this person would notice me even in my dreams...
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| EPIC FAILURE...
Yay! I just love how I put myself into the same situation over and over for the past years. Just when I think I have enough balls to have the conversation I become such a "P" word and back out. I'm really pissed at myself and really wish I had just let it out. I would still have become scared shitless but then again everything would have been out in the open. Poop. Why do I do this to myself? Why!?!?!
One of my guy friends had once told me that he would get two jaw breakers and put it in a bag. He would put his name on the bag and give it to me. He told me he would lend me his balls and thought if he did that I could actually have enough courage to have the conversation. I thought that was cute and how that really just cheered me up a bit.
I'll have the balls to do it "next time". Yeah...that's what I keep telling myself...
Every time...
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| INKED. Two Hours of non-stop pain. Was it worth it...? HELL YES! IT WAS DAMN WORTH IT!
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| Congratulations to me!
Alrighty, for those of you who don't know I have been presented with the greatest opportunity. Starting next week I'll be working at the Four Seasons! hehe. I guess things are slowly coming along in the right direction. It's a bit of a crap shift but I'd be crazy if I didn't take the position. Hopefully things will come as a routine quickly and I wont loose my mind. I know this position will be very demanding since everyone and their mama wants their croissants and breakfast pastries in the morning. I'm excited to start but still a little bummed to have to start the whole going to work routine. Poop.
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| Just when I think I'm finally stress free there's always something that throws me back under the bus. Meh...
Gosh damn it! Everything is soo damn expensive! How do people expect to pay rent when there income is hella low?!?! Who the hell was the genius who built a place w/ NO freaking kitchen. That I will not understand. WTF!?!?
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